The Wonderful World of Yuna Halo

I is only not so smart.

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  • You're so lame, I bet you think this blog is about you... but you know what? You're probably right... dumbass.

    "Everyone who is famous sucked a dick to get where they are today. The only difference between us and them? We swallowed it!"
    -Jimmy Urine of Mindless Self Indulgence

    breeze still carries the sound
    maybe i'll disappear
    tracks will fade in the snow
    you won't find me here

    ice is starting to form
    ending what had begun
    i am locked in my head
    with what i've done
    i know you tried to rescue me
    didn't let anyone get in
    left with a trace of all that was
    and all that could have been

    please
    take this
    and run far away
    far away from me
    i am
    tainted
    the two of us
    were never meant to be
    all these
    pieces
    and promises and left behinds
    if only i could see
    in my
    nothing
    you meant everything
    everything to me
    gone fading everything
    and all that could have been

    please
    take this
    and run far away
    far as you can see
    i am
    tainted
    and happiness and peace of mind
    were never meant for me
    all these
    pieces
    and promises and left behinds
    if only i could see
    in my
    nothing
    you meant everything
    everything to me


The Seven Deadly Smurfs.

Posted by yunahalo on February 6, 2007

Adult Swim’s ‘Robot Chicken’ did a spoof on the movie Se7en using the Smurfs. I, being the bored idiot that I am, decided to elaborate on this with my own version. Enjoy it or hate it. I don’t care. But please feel free to comment! 😉

Lust//Smurfette
The Sin: Lust is usually thought of as being obsessive or excessive thoughts or desires of a sexual nature.
Explanation: All the other smurfs want to do her. Smurfette was created by Gargamel to destroy the Smurfs… assumingly with lust. Aside from a little girl smurf, she is the only female. The other smurfs wanting her is one thing, being that she really is the only thing for them to have sex with, but her constant flirting makes it hard for them to resist.
Consequence: All the smurfs will probably gang bang her, and she better like it.

Gluttony//Baker Smurf
The Sin: Modern views identify Gluttony as being associated with an overindulgence of food and drink, though in the past any form of thoughtless excess could fall within the definition of this sin.
Explanation: He bakes constantly, therefore he eats constantly. He spends most of his time chasing Greedy Smurf, as he is a thieving bastard. He can’t have all the food if someone steals it, right?
Punishment: He will have to be cut out of his mushroom house when he dies of obesity. Or maybe he will just rot there.

Avarice//Greedy Smurf
The Sin: Greed is, like Lust and Gluttony, a sin of excess. However, Greed as seen by the Church applied to the acquisition of wealth in particular. Scavenging and hoarding of materials or objects, theft and robbery, especially by means of violence, trickery, or manipulation of authority are all actions that may be inspired by greed.
Explanation: Greedy smurf constantly steals from the other smurfs, mostly Baker Smurf… which might be a good thing. Baker Smurf doesn’t need all that food anyways.
Punishment: He will likely be trial in the Smurf Court of Justice. What will they do with him? Hopefully cut off both hands and feet. You can’t steal without hands and you can’t run without feet. Greedy asshole.

Sloth//Lazy Smurf
The Sin: Modern interpretations are therefore much less stringent and comprehensive than they were in medeval times, and portray Sloth as being more simply a sin of laziness, of an unwillingness to act, and of an unwillingness to care.
Explanation: Lazy Smurf doesn’t do anything… at all. Except lying around all day. What kind of life is that?
Punishment: He’ll be buried alive simply because all the other Smurfs thought he was dead. He’s so lazy, he probably doesn’t even have a pulse, as that would waste energy. What exactly is he waiting around for anyways?

Wrath//Grouchy Smurf
The Sin: Wrath may be described as inordinate and uncontrolled feelings of hatred and anger.
Explanation: Grouchy Smurf is the makings of a mass murderer. Nothing can put a smile on his face. He’d rather insult you than do anything else in this world. Angry people are bad.
Punishment: Due to his high amount of anger issues, he’s likely to explode from sure frustration, leaving the other Smurfs in glee. He will not be missed.

Envy//Enamored Smurf
The Sin: enamoredsmurf.jpgLike Greed, Envy is characterized by an insatiable desire, they differ, however, for two main reasons: First, Greed is largely associated with material goods, whereas Envy may apply more generally.
Explanation: His entire life is based on trying to bag Smurfette. Enamored Smurf is so full of envy towards her that it’s not healthy. At all.
Punishment: He will be forced to watch all the other Smurfs bang Smurfette… with his hands tied behind his back so he can’t even enjoy watching.

Pride//Vanity Smurf
The Sin: In almost every list Pride is considered the original and most serious of The Seven Deadly Sins, and indeed the ultimate source from which the others arise. It is identified as a desire to be more important or attractive than others, failing to give compliments to others though they may be deserving of them, and excessive love of self.
Explanation: Vanity Smurf is obsessed with himself. Who actually carries a mirror around so the can constantly look at their face? A little pride in yourself is good, but Vanity Smurf takes it too far.
Punishment: He’ll drop his mirror and break it. The mirror shards will become airborne and lodge themselves into Vanity’s pretty little face.

Sources: Wikipedia.org, BlueBuddies.com and my own head.

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3 Responses to “The Seven Deadly Smurfs.”

  1. Nietzche said

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  2. Nietzche said

    If you have to much tracffic running through your web site then why don’t you use it to your advantage. Use the numbers to go to company’s inform them that you will advertise for them (the numbers speak for themselves). That way you don’t need to ask for donations. Just a thought use it or don’t use it, I dont’t care I just want… what do I want right now this very minute, Coffee I feel like coffee.
    Cheers

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    […]The Seven Deadly Smurfs. « The Wonderful World of Yuna Halo[…]…

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